I had a thought about big picture type stuff the other day at a stop light. Instead of focusing on all the sad things, I had a thought about all of the wonderful things I've done and experienced and contributed to over the years. I have three amazing sons that I gave birth to, breastfed all three of them through nipple pain, mastitis, fevers and abscesses all with their best interest at heart. We homeschooled for many years and I'm proud of the work that I did in them, even though it wasn't always done perfectly. I taught my children how to read, add and subtract and I showed them how to cook. They know how to clean the house and use the washing machine. That's not the point of this post, though, and I'll get there soon.
Everything that I've experienced and done, whether good or bad has brought me to where I am today. I'm here because of all of the things that were placed in my life. So, if I wanted to cancel out part of my past because of the pain that those things brought me, it would take away from who I am now. The death of my father when I was just eighteen years old ranks up there as the most painful thing I've ever experienced. I lost some other family members in the next few years that were integral in my life, but none as important as my daddy. My divorce after 23 years of marriage would be a close second as it's most like a death. Just as you can't go back in the past and change things, I can't cancel those two events. Would I love to have had my dad around to have met my kids? Absolutely. However, if my dad hadn't passed away, I'm not sure I would have become a Christ follower. That's an important development in anyone's life.
If I hadn't gotten divorced, would I have had to look within myself for strength and resilience? Probably not. I was coasting and my ex husband was no help. My mental health and physical fitness suffered during my marriage and especially during my divorce. I was drinking too much beer and eating stuff that was not healthy for me. I had put back on all the weight that I had lost a few years back and I was bordering on miserable because my clothes weren't fitting anymore, etc. I knew that something had to be done, so I did something.
I reached out to a friend who I'd seen on social media having fantastic results after completing a program called 75 Hard. I was intrigued. She told me to get in touch with her fitness coach to talk about it, so I did. We had a FaceTime call and I was terribly intimidated by the whole idea of 75 Hard. Google it, bro. Anyway, I wasn't in a place emotionally that I think I could have handled it, so instead I signed up for the 8 week winter challenge through the 1st Phorm app. I learned the importance of protein in my diet and the need to move consistently during the week and on the weekend because weekends count, y'all.
To say that I never looked back would be slightly inaccurate as I did backslide some last year and I yoyoed a bit between gaining and losing two to three pounds here and there, but I made a promise to myself at the beginning of 2022 that I was going to be fierce and focused. I started on December 26th by throwing out all of the Christmas goodies and started eating healthier immediately. The only bad food that I consumed was on December 31, 2021, which was New Year's Eve and I had some fried chicken and a beer. I haven't had alcohol since then and I don't plan on it. I also made a commitment to workout or get some movement in everyday, and I had a really good track record going until January 7th when I kind of flaked on the exercise. No matter, though.
I came back with a vengeance on my own record and I started over on the next day and I haven't missed a day since then. Today is day thirty-one of movement with some active rest days thrown in for good measure because you can't train muscles without giving them some recovery. I've also incorporated yoga into my fitness regime to take the place of my active rest days. Yoga has been life changing for me and I am committed to keeping that practice once a week. I've also started getting my nails done on a regular basis as a small reward to myself for keeping up with my physical activity and my wellness.
I haven't even touched on the most important piece of this journey and that's the mental benefit of it all. As I've said before, you can see the flex and the physical results of what I've been doing, but you can't see the inside. I feel shiny and new and excited and joyful because I've taken control of my health and fitness. Knowing that you're doing what's right is an amazing feeling. Not perfect, but what's right. There is some kind of security in routine, too. I feel that when I put together my meals for the week and when I plan my workouts.
One other thing I'll mention is that I don't allow myself to get frustrated with life anymore. I try to take each day as it comes and do the best I can with it. I have removed all the pressure from my life by that one decision. I set an intention for the day, primarily for it to be good no matter what. I always start the day off with a selfie on Instagram and I say to make it a great day, and I mean that. You have to make the decision to be happy. Just for an example, last Friday when it was going to get really cold, one of the clients of the business I work for was supposed to come into the office on that day. They called in early that morning to tell me that they couldn't (or didn't want to) come in because it was going to be too cold and basically implied that they cold weather was going to ruin the day for him. I said, "It's still going to be a great day!" And it was, despite the freezing temperatures. I even got out and grocery shopped and went to the gym that day!
The founder of 1stPhorm, Andy Frisella put out an email the other day that's stuck with me and I hope it sticks with you/helps you; he said,
"Time never stops...the question is, what are you going to do with it? They (winners) understand that time is going to pass whether they are pursuing their goals or not...The difference is winners start, keep improving, and never stop…"
So, I'll put it to you like Andy did....what are you going to do with your time?
